Category Archives: Hello There Drama

The Giver that takes too

Hello. Hello there

Hello there old friend. It’s been a while. Mr or Ms I don’t even know your name. It’s time again because that’s when you try to harass us the most. Cher tells us about you, but no one cares about Cher. Why don’t you care. Why don’t I care you have no name and slip into our souls while we our most vulnerable. Why should I care..because I don’t care what you do, or when you do it.

Looking Forward or Looking Back …What does it even mean anyway? No one understands you anyway. I just used the word anyway two times in two sentences and I know you don’t care. I’m about to do the same with the word care but more. But you don’t care. No one wants to research you. Do you care? Do you care as the people who question why always know what to do because they are reminded by there two thousand three hundred and sixty four Facebook friends. Oh we won’t forget. I won’t forget you. I know you are there because as others rejoice in the fact that they feel you are graciously giving something, I know you take something away. You take something away from our soul. I know you are there. How do ai feel it in my soul? I feel it in the pit of my stomach. I know when I eat my Jimmy Dean microwaveable biscuit. I know when I Alternate one sausage to one chicken. Because even if my Facebook friends forgot to tell me. My stomach would. We don’t care about you as much as you would hope. In past times we would have to change devices. Before we would have to think for several days after…is that right? Now technology doesn’t care what you do either. Technology is on our side. My devices changes without missing a step. Try to go unnoticed but I notice. I know the villain you are. The only thing that doesn’t is the stove. Why are stoves still dumb, because maybethey fear you as I don’t. Fear not, with that extra you have now…go to the kitchen and make a change. A change that will last a while. You are evil. I will see you again in the spring.

You’re not from the pond


Hello there provider of life. Without you we are nothing. Without you we would be so parched. Without you I feel so Parched. You are the biggest gulp not just a big gulp. You are perfect for me. Some people ponder life on their porch with you … while I ponder where you come from. You are different than the rest. You come in all forms shapes and sizes but your size is perfect? There is something different about you something more satisfying. Something more refreshing, something We live our lives taking for granted to what we come across, but then when we find you. We quench something that hasn’t been quenched before. We are used to the tap. We are use to be the fountains, and then you come along. You with your majestic logo stuck on your perfectly shaped plastic body. Oh and we know that your plastic is different. Deerfield, Nestle they have nothing on you. We know your liquid life Juice has to come from the fountains of heaven being poured by Angels. That’s why you cost so much. You are not like the normal, that’s why We can’t get enough of you. Thank you for providing my body with the essential basic elements of life. Because Fiji to me, is not just a place anymore. It’s where you are from.

The Deep Abyss

Hello..Hello there dark abyss. Hello there endless darkness. I know you want to devour anything that stumbles as I sit. A random fry, a few pieces of copper and one silver, even a long lost hair bow belonging to my daughter. I see you. I know you are down there. If I mute my podcast, I can hear you. I can hear the hopes and dreams of a thousand people all at the same time. What makes you? What do you do and how do you do it. Why do you want to taunt us with that fear. Do you enjoy it? I know you do. People fear you but say nothing about you. People know you but don’t acknowledge you. You don’t even have a name. You are the unknown. But you. Yes you. You know we will meet. We will meet again and again and again. I bet you laugh an evil laugh. I bet your soul is as cold as a touch from Elsa. Phone Rings. I know you giggle. I am not on hands free so I carefully turn the phone around to see who is calling. I answer. With every pause in my conversation I know you are whispering to me. “That’s mine” you say. I pause and listen closer, but you won’t repeat yourself. Your to smooth for that. I continue to talk while you wait. Waiting so patiently. How do you do it. You slip from my mind like you always do. I am now caught up in a conversation about what’s for dinner. But you already know. You know what you are having. You are having my hopes. My dreams. You are having the enjoyment of my sighs my tears. That’s what you wait for. That’s what you need.
“Ok. I will be home in a few minutes” as I end my conversation. You are silent. This is your opportunity. This is the time. I reach to hit end. The chain of events are among us. I cannot stop the force. Mis balance. iPhone 6plus reaching with one finger holding in one hand is too much. Just too much. A slight slip, a rotation that is impossible to be recreated. Trying to keep one hand on wheel while the other bobbles you. I see you in the distance as I try to regain what I have lost. Gravity takes over. I can’t do it. Your laugh becomes louder your breathing deepens with each breath. To you …as you look up its in slow motion. Front screen, back screen, front screen back screen. I got this. No I don’t. Yes I do and now you are gone.
You have used your evil powers once again. There is no way I could do what I just did again. Michael Jordan could not make that shot. You have slipped straight where I didn’t want you to be and now you are out of my sight.
Leaning, reaching, fingers twitching. Stretching. Swerving to shoulder. Buuurrrbbbuurrr the noise sounds as I hit the rivets on the road. I feel something. That’s not you. What is that. A pack of hot mustard? Where did you go. You have won again. I cannot find you. The abyss has won the darkness has covered you. I know you feel alone. But until I stop, move my seat forward and back sometimes requiring an extra light source… I will have to wait. You will have to be alone.

I dislike you abyss. But I will prevail. I will get my iPhone soon. I’m almost home.

Keeper of the Damp Cave


Hello there man. Standing there half damp, your advertising bling shirt pressed with khakis. You always have that slight smile on your face…don’t you? Huh .. Do you smile because you are in control? Yes you do. You know it. Right hand up, begin the motion. Left hand up, begin the opposite motion. And then you realize. Stop! You recognize me. Eye contact through the glass. Yeah it’s me. The same one. I’m watching you with an eye that only an eagle would as it gazes on its prey. I see your soul I’m looking so deep. Blue eyes, yep but I see more. Right hand down, left hand down. I see your concern…you know me. You begin to go limp. I’m in control now. It’s me. I’m have control. Should you even point to the next four steps. I said..You know me. You know I am right on track. I’m always flawless. You know I need no direction from you. No slight right, never slight left, don’t even put your hands up..never. You glance over your shoulder you want to point at the sign, the rollers are pulling me closer. Close enough now where you can see my hazel eyes getting bigger. Don’t tell me I need to be in neutral. Why? I’m done there. Don’t tell me to keep hands off steering wheel. Why? Because both hands are now behind my head. Don’t tell me to keep foot off break. Why? Because it’s on the dash. You know me. You continue to stare. As I roll by close enough to roll my window down and give you a fist bump, i don’t. I look back up. I’m ready to enter oh noble one. I live for this hot wax with shine moment. You know me. I just have you a 20 second break. You want to thank me but you won’t. We will meet again in 4 to 7 days. I mouth the words…as if in slow motion. T h a n k Y o u… time is now. Pull out iPhone for 60 seconds of relaxation before the vacuuming begins.

These Crabtree Chronicles by me will continue. Stay tuned for your next epic status post adventure.

The Slave called Flash


Hello there laying in the bottom of the drawer. Wandering when will it be your turn. You dream of sticking out the side proudly ready to help move needed items from one to another. A transporter you are. I use you. You lay dormant when I don’t need you. Your mere existence forgotten, shunned, not needed…..until ready, always knowing there will come a time when I will need you. When I do you are there. That time is now. You must have the room, you must make the room. Most people don’t really understand the room, your size..what does that mean. I do. I appreciate you. Pop the cap, twist the end, flip around, or are you solid state. As I place you closer, I anticipate. Anticipate the ding. The ding I only hear when you are ready. Then I use you. Right Click Copy, Right Click Paste. Im Done. You have fulfilled your obligation. But now comes the horror. I cannot wait, not one more second, I can not wait, why should I properly eject. I don’t even know what that means….I begin to laugh under my breath, knowing that ding is coming again. I tell you I will refuse…refuse to properly… I never treat you proper. I scream No. Then I unplug. Ding. I hear you. Is it a cry from not being disconnected properly, or joy from being done. I don’t know. i don’t care. Give me the error, tell me to eject properly next time..guess what..I won’t. Why. Why… because you have my file saved and ready for transport. That is what I care about. File is transferred and back to the desk you go. They call you Flash for a reason. You flash my Heart with transfer greatness. As for the removal who cares.

The Deserted Isle


Hello man all alone with your blinker on, stranded on your deserted island in the turn lane… I see you, I am your friend. But, I am merely the inside lane traffic holder. I am doing my job. I will continue for at least 13 more seconds, with diligence. You only need one kind, decent person to pause…pause for just a second…wait, is it you Mr. UPS?…is it you Mr. green truck…no…surely it is you Church…
I glance in my rear view, I see anger from the cars behind me…I can only wait so much longer. I am feeling doubt, concern, anger, hurt…my emotions are taking over..I want you to be able to turn, but I can not hold much longer.
Eye contact with you, and you see my concern. I whisper “I am trying, trying so hard” a slight nod of your head tells me you know, and at this moment we are one. I look back in my mirror sweat rolls from my brow, I look back at you as I start to roll my car to a slow crawl, still hoping one person, just one will join me on this quest to help you in the other lane to cross traffic.
Eye contact. I whisper “I am so sorry” you smile and say “It’s ok”. Thank you lone survivor whomever you are and I hope 2 brave heroes allow you to get your Starbucks …soon..

The Number that’s not just a Number


Hello there numerical digit. Oh your not just any number are you? Your the first. The first number in an infinite string of numerical bliss. If settling to be the number 1 wasn’t good enough for you and your all mighty highness…they made you red. Not just a normal red…but a deep, heart throbbing, soul taking, blood like red. Who are you? Who is hiding behind your shining glory. Are you a wishful approval of an earlier link about the snow fall before Thanksgiving? Are you a reply to my ultimate check in at the local Grocery store? I don’t know, but you are there, I must check…soon. Sooner than later, because I know my fate if I don’ will transform to a 2, then a 3. I have to know. You are hard to touch with the same hand I hold my device with, but you will not get away..I have another. Left hand up, pointer finger extended. 6 inches away…5…4…3…2.. No one call, no one need anything from me for one more second. One more small moment. I can feel the screen, the heat sensors accepting my digit. What friend awaits…..sweat drops…comment?…like?… What, Who, are you? /sigh …… invite….disappointment sets in.

The Three Eyed Monster


Hello three eyed monster hanging in the distance. I see you and all of your green shining Glory. You are still a good distance away from me, but I know we see each other. 3 eye to 2 eye …contact. I begin to hear your evil laugh rumbling as if you are sitting next to me. I am going 45 miles per hour. You know my braking distance…you must…all you see are cars all day long with the occasional worker in a box lift to change your bulbs. You begin your evil plot, your evil scheme, we both know what your plans are. You are no longer a friendly light, but one who is out for vengeance.

Foot on pedal, increase speed to 50. You are not winning, I am. I am watching your every green led glare. There is no way the turning time has reached its end. 40 yards green, heavy breathing, 30 yards green, I got this, 20 yards green eyes glare, I sit up in my seat. Then laughs turns to hate…hate leads to..

Yellow!!!! Brake , Gas Pedal, back to break, do I stop, Go, stop no! Go go go…emotions pour, anxiety sets in, tense legs, heart pounds,looking for cameras…Punch it! Punch it! Change, rear view glance… Flash! Flash!

You win again, until next time my fake friend..until next time.